


a pain that demands to be felt

by captainchar



Category: Gallagher Girls Series - Ally Carter
Genre: Angst, Breakup, Coming to terms with the reality of a situation, Drabble, F/M, Fresh Start, No Dialogue, lots and lots of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-29
Updated: 2014-06-29
Packaged: 2018-02-06 17:26:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1866207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainchar/pseuds/captainchar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cammie takes some time out to help mend her broken heart.</p><p>Drabble.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a pain that demands to be felt

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know what this is.
> 
> ff.net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10493781/1/a-pain-that-demands-to-be-felt

She didn't know what she was doing, sitting there. 

Taking in a breath of fresh air, she slid off the wall and walked along by the stream. 

It was damp but fresh out, allowing for a slight chill to reach her skin. But she liked it, so she didn't remove the jacket tied around her waist. 

Her arms swung in the breeze as she took in the scenery. The place was an abundance of green conifers and tall trees that let small slivers of sunlight through the leaves. Water dripped and rushed around to her left and the sounds created a soothing backdrop to the thoughts rushing around her head. 

She needed the chill and the sounds to numb the pain. The pain she hated and resented, almost as much as she resented him for what he had done. 

He broke her heart. He took it in his hands, tore it in two and threw it back to her to repair the damage. 

She wanted to cry. She wanted the sound of her sobs to mix in with nature's melody so as to release the pain she felt. Alas, she wouldn't. 

It hurt. It hurt so much it made her chest burst and heart ache. It made her head spin in circles and her body to fumble about. Life seemed drained of happiness and light now. She was stuck in the dark. 

How could he? They were so happy. He was happy. She was happy. There were no signs of bad blood between them. Disputes were sorted out easily, they saw each other regularly and they were both so in love it was euphoric. 

She willed herself to understand - for her mind to arrange the puzzle pieces and for the image to make sense. It didn't. The entire situation was just a blur. 

Answers were needed. Pieces were missing, surely. 

Or maybe it was a lot simpler than she thought. 

Maybe he was never in love with her in the first place. 

Maybe she was only in love with him and he didn't quite feel the same way. 

It was perfectly possible. She felt deeply and others didn't. Others like Zach. 

He may have just said that he loved her to please her, to make her happy. He may have just gone along with it the hope that he would learn to love her. 

Maybe this break up was a good thing. Maybe it was a clean break. 

She grabbed the nearest stone along the path and hurled it into the river in anger. 

He lied. He lied to her and he lied to others. 

How many other things had he lied about? How many other things had he not meant? That he'd always be there for her? That he'd take care of those things that one time? 

It explained a lot. 

Because if she thinks their relationship didn't have it's faults, Cammie would be lying to herself. 

In her head she thought it was perfect. As for their dynamic, it was. 

In reality? Cracks were there. Walls were there. Dishonesty created a rift between them. 

Zach's dishonesty. Cammie's lack of communication skills. 

Lies. Lies. Lies. 

She couldn't handle the realisation. She wouldn't admit it. 

At least Zach could. At least Zach cut off something unhealthy before it infected everything else. 

In that moment, she understood. She respected his decision. 

But she will never, ever stop loving him. 

She lay down on the riverbank and breathed in the fresh air. 

Time for a new start.


End file.
